Mrs. Adrian really got me upset during one of our ‘dissection‘ sessions. She told me, ‘Njenva, you need to pray about your decision making skills in terms of people’s character. You need to ask God to help you receive good judgment of character‘ I was so upset. How dare she even question my people assessment skills? I am a trained HR professional, this is what I do on a daily basis. I judge people for a living 🙂 !!! She prayed for me on that particular day but I thought she was out of line with  that statement. The other day, I asked you readers for help on what to blog about and then I started thinking about JINK. And remembered Mrs. Adrian’s statement …

About 4 years ago, nJenva was working with this very demanding (I had to really think about the word to use here!) organisation and things were as horrible as they could get. To make things worse, her only friend at that time, an Intern was fired and another Intern was sourced to take up her place. Everyone in her team was excited because the new intern was from a famous family. Njenva wasn’t bothered and had decided to ignore the new intern. When the new intern joined the team, Njenva managed to ignore her for about one month. One day, she decided to invite the now permanent employee for lunch. And so, JI was formed when IO became friends with Njenva. (And IO’s version of the story is that I didn’t talk to her while she was an Intern, only when she got permanent employment!)

Sometime later, another  employee joined their department and since IO is a very sociable person, she made friends with Nas. And every time IO and I planned to do anything, she would drag Nas along. So I sort of just got used to hanging out as JIN, even though at that point I didn’t see why we needed to hang out with Nas. I later warmed up to Nas, especially seeing that we had very similar ghetto backgrounds 🙂 Later on, I was not surprised when IO introduced KYS to the mix. What I didn’t expect was that she would complete JINK. I was so concerned about not including her in my list of friends that when she got another job in another country and had to leave Kenya, it hit me hard to realise that she had wormed her way into my heart and that I was going to be very sad without her presence.  At least she is in the country often so it isn’t too bad……..

Every time JINK meets up, I am reminded of how different we all are and how complimentary that is to our vibrant and very amazing friendship. An attempt at a summary of JINK is as follows: (Click image to view a larger version)

JINK Table……..

IO and I soon followed suit and left the workplace where we had met but JINK has grown even more after that. To imagine that these are people that I had dismissed from my life makes me question myself. When will I ever learn not to judge a book by it’s cover? When will I learn that what you see from people is rarely what you get? I keep on praying that God will give me wisdom and insight so that I can see people for who they really are. So that I can stop focusing on what is on the outside and what everyone sees but to see them as God sees them. This book opened my eyes to this wisdom that Mrs. Adrian was trying to help me understand. And with JINK, I think I now understand!

11 responses »

  1. Njenva…makes for a very interesting read. I will not inundate you with comments on it…but yeah, glad everything turned out well in the end. And the fact that it turned out alright means that even though you had misplaced perceptions initially, you were in a way open to be proven either wrong or right.

    The table analysis is for the most part correct…although some categories beg discussion…I never ever thought to do this…I think this might call for the next retreat…

    Hi Ciiku 😉

    • IO, WOW. You commented. Thanks. 🙂

      I am worried that the said retreat might be my own intervention…… Please promise that there will be no interventions targeted towards me during the retreat?

  2. This is so cool! I’m famous!!! Autographs anyone??? (Is it possible to be secretively famous??)…But seriously, me thinks the solution to your perceived problem Njenva is to stick to the people you love to hate 🙂 ….Much luv!

  3. Nice article…and i think you are good at analysing people! i think you need to get another term for KYS ‘Quarreling people’ to something else…dont have the correct term for it yet. Something like what that guy for 1000 words does to eddie murphy.

    • 🙂 Do you know I actually got into trouble for the ‘Quarreling People’ statement….so you are actually right. 🙂 Guess what I wore last week? The BFF bracelet you got us!!!!

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